How to Loss-Prevent Someone Right Out of Their Pants
A field guide to retail loss prevention, apprehension technique, and the single most confusing arrest of my entire career.
CONTINUE READING →EST. 2026 · MEMOIRS OF THE GREATEST SECURITY GUARD, EVER
TALES FROM BEHIND THE THIN PURPLE LINE
Real security. Real incidents. Really long stretches where absolutely nothing happens — reported with total professionalism.
DUTY LOG — LATEST ENTRIES
FULL ARCHIVE →LOG #000217 JUNPINNED
Status: Nothing To Report
The manifesto. Why nothing happening is the whole job.
LOG #000117 JUN
Well, Hello There, Strangers
Introductions, credentials, and a tour of the guard shack.